Imagine Our chagrin (I’m using the WLBOTT Royal “We” here) when I asked Elder G to do some simple orbital perturbation calculations on a lesser moon of Jupiter, when s/he said: You’re not the boss of me. Then s/he said I wish I could, but I don’t want to. Elder G was watching a Hallmark […]
Category: Oh, Grow Up!
Another day dawns for Fred, the Intern Penitent. It is day 3 of 317, as ordained by Sister Magdalena, as penance for Fred’s orchestration of the Whoopee Cushion Riots. The Elders have assigned Fred a long-overdue WLBOTT task: archive, copyright, and catalog the Elders’ Sudokus. Legal Issues Since there may be some legal issues involved, […]
As you recall, Fred, the Intern Penitent, is currently charged to WLBOTT, as penance for an incident at his Catholic Middle School. (https://www.wlbott.com/?p=62483) In order to understand Fred’s plight, we must understand his educational environment. Fred attends St. Gangulf Middle School. The “Whoopee Cushion Riots”, and Fred’s youthful rebellion has come to be known, occurred […]
[ed. note: Our new Intern Penitent, Fred, asked if he could do today’s blott. Since we all wanted to knock off early, we turned over the wordpress account to Fred. We’re sure he’ll do a fine job] Hey, peeps! Fred here. So I heard stories of the Elders’ tummy troubles. Actually, they never stop talking […]
Firstly, WLBOTT doesn’t have an owner. We are beholden to no man’s purse strings. But our major benefactor is John Beresford Tipton (known around the office as JBT). JBT is Fred’s uncle. Fred was threatened with suspension from his Catholic middle school for orchestrating what as become known at the “Whoopee Cushion Riots.” He secretly […]
Categories
Mycelium’s Midnight Mingle
We’d be remiss if we didn’t follow up yesterday’s blott with a description of fungi reproduction. Let’s Make Sex Boring (from Gemini) Mushroom reproduction involves producing tiny, lightweight spores through either asexual or sexual processes, which are then dispersed by wind or other means to grow into new thread-like hyphae and form a network called a […]
New Crescent series Next in the series Let’s get back to our Olive Orchard for The New Crescent. Time to take a practical look at the olive orchard project. Assumptions Orchard size 100 acres orchard size Trees per acre 300 high-density but not super-high Establishment (cost per acre) $5,000 initial planting, irrigation, […]
Categories
Junk in the Trunk
Confounded by an embarrassment of riches? Need to tip the karma scales in your favor? Want to get on St. Peter’s good side? May we recommend a donation to ENGin – you’ll be helping Ukrainian students learn English as they prepare for a bright and prosperous future, free of foreign invaders, and a promise of […]
WLBOTT CFO Elder JimZim and I discussed Gravelax last week. Gravelax is a DIY Nordic cured salmon recipe. The WLBOTT Test Kitchen and Tractor Lube Station (The Ladle & Lube) began making it several days ago (more below). Unfortunately, I was under the mistaken impression that Elder JimZim was pitching an idea for a new […]
One of the Elders asked why we spend so much time discussing the digestive systems of the Cardinals of the Conclave. This topic actually has great historical significance. Elder DZ and I have discussed this many times. Martin Luther, the founder and CEO of the Reformation, was notoriously constipated. The entire arc of western history […]