The Canadian-American Peace Plan

Elder UC#1 has brought to our attention a potentially sensitive matter concerning Canadian-US relationships.

We are happy to announce that UC#1 has been promoted to the director of the WLBOTT Media Division (WMD).

The WMD has been granted access to Air Force One, but only as part of the cleaning crew. We see it as getting our foot in the door.

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Hockey

The tension between the two countries can be seen in the recent Canada / US hockey match (3 fights in nine seconds).

A match between the United States and Canada descended into chaos on Saturday with three fights breaking out between players in the first nine seconds.

Players exchanged punches at Montreal’s Bell Centre during the 4 Nations fixture, which the US won 3-1 with Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau in attendance.

The game was played against the backdrop of tensions between the neighbouring countries and the pre-game US national anthem was loudly booed by the partisan home crowd.

Booing the US anthem has become a regular occurrence in NHL and NBA games played in Canada.

It comes after United States President Donald Tump said he will impose tariffs on imported goods from its North American neighbours, while he has also floated the idea of Canada becoming the US’s 51st state.

BBC

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Spill-Over Hostilities

Sadly, we’re concerned that this antagonism may spill over onto other cultural exchanges. Ballet, for example.

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WLBOTT Brokers a Peace Plan

Canada has 10 provinces:

• Alberta
• British Columbia
• Manitoba
• New Brunswick
• Newfoundland and Labrador
• Nova Scotia
• Ontario
• Prince Edward Island
• Quebec
• Saskatchewan

Canada also has three territories: Northwest Territories, Nunavut, and Yukon.

It is only fair and balanced that Canada should enter the union as 13 states, with 26 senators and 56 representatives.

U.S. population keeps growing, but House of Representatives is same size as in Taft era
By Drew DeSilver

The U.S. House of Representatives has one voting member for every 747,000 or so Americans. That’s by far the highest population-to-representative ratio among a peer group of industrialized democracies, and the highest it’s been in U.S. history. And with the size of the House capped by law and the country’s population continually growing, the representation ratio likely will only get bigger.

Pew Research

So, Canada would bring 26 senators and 56 representatives to the august body of the United States Congress.

Current makeup:

Assuming that all the Canadian reps come over as blue (for obvious reasons), the new makeup would be:

Senators:

• Blue: 47+26 = 73
• Red: 53

Representatives:

• Blue: 215+56 = 271
• Red: 220

Elder G graphs it out for us:

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Agenda for the New Congress

• Install a new Speaker of the House. Send Mike Johnson back to whatever used car dealership he came from
• Impeach tRump
• Impeach J.D.
• Install the new speaker as president
• Write a blank check to Ukraine
• Install 8 additional Supreme Court Justices
• Impeach Clarence Thomas
• Overturn Citizens United, Presidential Immunity, etc.
• Pass Medicare for All
• Tax the k-rap out of corporations and billionaires
• Apologize officially and publicly to all our former allies.
• Force Bezos to do something with that bald-ass head of his
• Prosecute, convict, and deport Emusk.
• The US Post Office in Point Roberts must be remodeled (designs below)

Note: NightCafe refused to generate any images when the prompt included “Force Bezos to do something with that bald-ass head of his.” This covert censorship is oppressive.

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The Historic Moment

The historic peace treaty, brokered by the Elders of WLBOTT, yielded many commemorative images.

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Little known fact: This is actually the second peace treaty WLBOTT has brokered between the US and Canada. The first, occurring in 1812 was captured in this painting by Canadian artist Wandaleeta Wolverine. It is currently on display at the White House Gift Shop’s men’s room.

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References

Point Roberts

Treaty history specific to Point Roberts

After years of joint occupation of the disputed area between Mexican California and Russian America (now Alaska) known as the Oregon Country to the Americans, and as the Columbia District to the British, American expansionists like U.S. Senator Edward A. Hannegan of Indiana urged U.S. President James K. Polk to annex the entire Oregon Country up to latitude 54°40′N, as the Democrats had been elected on the slogan “Fifty-Four Forty or Fight”.

Wikipedia

Florian Fuchs, CC BY 3.0, provides us this image: A strongly worded sign protects our border.

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Point Roberts U.S. Post Office

As part of the treaty negotiations, this post office must be rennovated.

Current photo by Quentin Melson – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=73875783

Remodeling Ideas:

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Elder G’s Code

import matplotlib.pyplot as plt
import numpy as np

# Current U.S. Congress composition before hypothetical change
current_senate = {"Democrats": 51, "Republicans": 49}  # Including independents caucusing with Dems
current_house = {"Democrats": 213, "Republicans": 222}

# Hypothetical addition of Canada as 13 new states
new_senators = {"Democrats": 26, "Republicans": 0}
new_representatives = {"Democrats": 56, "Republicans": 0}

# Updated composition after Canada's addition
updated_senate = {
    "Democrats": current_senate["Democrats"] + new_senators["Democrats"],
    "Republicans": current_senate["Republicans"] + new_senators["Republicans"],
}

updated_house = {
    "Democrats": current_house["Democrats"] + new_representatives["Democrats"],
    "Republicans": current_house["Republicans"] + new_representatives["Republicans"],
}

# Plot Senate Composition
plt.figure(figsize=(12, 6))
plt.subplot(1, 2, 1)
plt.pie(updated_senate.values(), labels=updated_senate.keys(), autopct='%1.1f%%', startangle=140)
plt.title("Updated U.S. Senate Composition")

# Plot House Composition
plt.subplot(1, 2, 2)
plt.pie(updated_house.values(), labels=updated_house.keys(), autopct='%1.1f%%', startangle=140)
plt.title("Updated U.S. House Composition")

plt.show()