“War is Peace. Freedom is Slavery. Love is… complicated.”
Ah, George (he’s single, ladies!). After being rejected by the Jehovah’s Witnesses, the local Astrology meet-up, and even the community college HTML class, he’s resorted to on-line dating. Again, he has bad luck – he signs up to an on-line dating service called “The Ministry of Love™”. Unbeknownst to George, the service is based on the book 1984 by George Orwell. Even the casual observer can see that things won’t go well.
CheChe
George was soon matched with CheChe, a young lady with musical talents and organizational skills.
Although CheChe’s profile pictures showed her serious commitment to the cause (ed. note: cause undetermined at this point), he pictured the softer, gentler, nurturing, perhaps even maternal side of CheChe. George can envision CheChe as the mother of his children.
CheChe likes to vacation in tropical garden spots, such as Nicaragua, El Salvador, and Venezuela.
CheChe invited George to her tropical getaway for their first date.
The Ministry of Love™ takes the safety of their clients seriously. They do due diligence.
Before George can meet CheChe, he must first meet with a Ministry chaperon, Manuel. To break the ice, Manuel asks George about his experiences with plastic explosives.
George thought their first date went well, but was concerned that he may have misread the vibe, due to his high malarial fever.
About the Ministry of Love™ Dating Site
A Founder’s Story: Karen Sue (Esperanza) Shrew
Karen Sue (Esperanza) Shrew, known affectionately as “The Great White Bitch” by her employees, is truly an American success story. Armed with nothing more than her GED and $5,000,000 in seed money from her father, she has created the Ministry of Love™ in her own image.
Many believe her life-view was formed as a young teen. At the family Thanksgiving gathering, a huge fight broke out over the pumpkin pie. Her mother vocally and aggressively refused her demand. Her simple request was for a piercing (whose location was graphically described by E.S.) Nobody had seconds on the pie.
Esperanza has her own Work/Life Balance presentation, and is in great demand on the corporate lecture circuit. She also considers transparency key to a healthy organization, as reflected in her corporate bulletin reflecting her open door policy.
Stills from the management chain, featured in the brochure “MOL Open Door Policy – technically we offer it; you’re not expected to use it.“
Board of Directors
Advisory Panel
Reception and Customer Service
Have your paperwork in order and four forms of photo identification before proceeding to reception. You may be subject to a TSA-quality search. (For a small fee, enhanced searches available upon request.)
Satisfied Customers
On the Shoulders of Giants
WLBOTT does not exist in a vacuum. We stand on the shoulders of giants, and were inspired by one of the true collective geniuses of our time – The Austin Lounge Lizards. We gratefully acknowledge their inspiration for today’s blott.
And for the purists, the canonical version with fiddle and Peter Gunn riff….