Q: What is the bane of every parents’ life?A: The 7th grade science fair. WLBOTT has been selected to judge the annual science fair at Rufus T. Firefly Middle School in Bryan-College Station, Texas. The Scorpion Symphony: Can Scorpions Dance to Music? Aerodynamics of the Tortilla This turned out to be a popular area of […]
Author: Texas Toast
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Corn / Maize
When I was a Younger Elder, I thought I noticed an anachronism in the Bible. Jesus and his disciples were gleaning corn on a Sunday, and the local proto-MAGA trolls were criticizing Him for working on the Sabbath. Corn was a new world crop, and wouldn’t appear in Jerusalem for 1,500 years. So what gives? […]
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Texas Heat / Texas Corn
The same year that the Elders gathered in Snook, Texas to consume chicken fried bacon, a terrible wildfire scorched Bastrop State Park (September and October 2011). The Drought Jeff Goodell, in his book The Heat Will Kill You First: Life and Death on a Scorched Planet, talks with a south Texas farmer about a drought-ravaged […]
We note that sometimes just the appearance of enjoying life can anger certain segments of the population. This will not stop us. When they go high, we go low. Low. As in “get down.” As in “we like to boogie.” Thanks to Elder KM for taking us down this rabbit hole. The Elders Get Down! […]
When asking “Just How High are the Elders?”, there seems to be some confusion between “elevation” and “euphoria.” Let us enumerate. Enigmatic Euphoria Epic Euphoria Ethereal Euphoria Heroic Euphoria Joyous Euphoria Pastoral Euphoria Placid Euphoria Spiritual Euphoria
A question we are often asked: “Just how high are the Elders?” Let’s explore. (Thanks to topigraphic-maps.com and UC#1) Edmonton Darwin, Minnesota (World’s Largest Ball of Twine) Santa Barbara, Ca. Maryland and D.C. HousTex CenTex Snook, Texas (Chicken Fried Bacon) Oslo, Norway Austin, Minnesota (Spam Museum) Greenland Oh, Grow Up! Phuket, Thailand Lake Titicaca, Peru […]
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Ice, Austin Style
Jeff Goodell’s book The Heat Will Kill You First is proving to be fascinating. As an Austin resident, he is able to describe global climate change and give recent examples from south and central Texas [ed. note: WLBOTT corporate headquarters is located in Central Texas]. Droughts, floods, hurricanes, crop loss, but perhaps most bizarrely, the […]
Yesterday, our Corporate HQ telecommunications system received a text alert from the credit card company. Weird charges on our credit card. The big, bad charge was for over $3,500, paid to a large corporate entity that collects rents and distributes the money to landlords. Then the crooks decided to celebrate and order $48 from a […]
Once upon a time, long ago but not too long ago, Elder UC#3, UC#4-SU, Sally T. Intern, UC#2 and I met up at Sodolak’s Original Country Inn in Snook, Texas. The quest: a pilgrimage to the origin of Chicken Fried Bacon. Our get-together was in August of 2011, during a serious Texas drought. We both […]
The Second ComingW. B. Yeats (1919)Turning and turning in the widening gyreThe falcon cannot hear the falconer;Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhereThe ceremony of innocence is drowned;The best lack all conviction, while the worstAre full of passionate intensity.Surely some revelation is at […]