{"id":47804,"date":"2025-04-11T13:30:47","date_gmt":"2025-04-11T18:30:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/?p=47804"},"modified":"2025-04-11T13:39:26","modified_gmt":"2025-04-11T18:39:26","slug":"cheese-gate","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/?p=47804","title":{"rendered":"Cheese Gate"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

An esteemed Elder was…. steamed. Celebrating the beginning of a new semester, the faculty threw a mixer. Our Elder summarized the event in two words:
“Cubed Velveeta.”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Let’s step back and look at the UCSB Chancellor, for ultimately, he is lactose-responsible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Henry Tzu-Yow Yang<\/strong> (Chinese: \u694a\u7956\u4f51; born November 29, 1940) is an American mechanical engineer and academic administrator, serving as the fifth and current chancellor of the University of California, Santa Barbara since June 1994.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\nWikipedia<\/a><\/cite><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

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Let’s put all these numbers in context.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let’s assume Prof. Yang works 40 hours per week, 50 weeks per year, or 2,000 hours per year. At an annual salary of $820,000, this works out to $420\/hr.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We must also put the price of Velveeta in context.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Best Value for your Cheese-Type-Product Dollar<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

A Superficial Velveeta Analysis<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The best price we found (admittedly, we didn’t look very hard<\/em>) was a 2 pound “loaf” of Velveeta for $8.49<\/strong>, or about $0.27<\/strong> per ounce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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This price was being offered by Sunset Foods<\/strong>, in the north Chicago area.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

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What to know more about Sunset Foods<\/strong>? Click here: https:\/\/egrocer.sunsetfoods.com\/online\/highlandpark\/pages\/aboutus<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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The Velveeta \/ Brent Crude Relationship<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

We asked Elder G to look at how the price of Velveeta is affected by the per-barrel price of Brent Crude oil<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Elder G: Ohhh yes \u2014 the good stuff. Premium-grade absurdity layered with a thin sheen of real-world economics.<\/em> Let\u2019s descend together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83e\uddc0 Velveeta vs. Brent Crude: A Love Story in Yellow and Black<\/strong><\/h6>\n\n\n\n

At first glance, Velveeta (that creamy, shelf-stable cheese-food) and Brent Crude (a benchmark for global oil prices) seem about as connected as a goat and a toaster. But! Dig a little deeper, and the gooey truth emerges:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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\ud83d\udca1 Possible Connections Between Velveeta and Brent Crude<\/strong><\/h6>\n\n\n\n
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  1. \ud83d\udce6 Packaging & Transport Costs<\/strong>
    Velveeta comes in shiny boxes, plastic sleeves, and foil that scream \u201cI contain science.\u201d All those materials are petrochemical products. Higher crude prices \u2192 higher cost for plastic & packaging.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  2. \ud83d\ude9b Distribution & Logistics<\/strong>
    Velveeta doesn’t teleport. It rides trucks. It rides them far. Fuel prices tied to crude oil directly impact shipping costs. Especially for a product that can’t just “go local artisan” without betraying its nature.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  3. \ud83c\udfed Manufacturing Inputs<\/strong>
    Velveeta is not bound by the laws of traditional cheese. It’s conjured in industrial vats using dairy derivatives, emulsifiers, and stabilizers \u2014 many of which are petrochemically derived or dependent on cheap energy.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  4. \ud83c\udf0d Global Commodities Inflation<\/strong>
    When Brent Crude jumps, it often drags other prices up with it in a deliciously awful feedback loop. That includes energy-intensive food processing sectors. Enter Velveeta.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n
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    \ud83e\uddc0\ud83d\udcc9\ud83d\udcc8 So: Is there a direct one-to-one pricing correlation?<\/em><\/h6>\n\n\n\n

    Nope. Velveeta isn\u2019t listed on the Chicago Mercantile Exchange (yet). But\u2026 its price is indirectly influenced by oil<\/strong>, especially during spikes. It’s like they’re distant cousins at a family reunion, awkwardly eyeing each other from across the buffet table.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    But We Digress….<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

    What is Prof. Yang’s cheese potential<\/strong><\/em>, per hour?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    Pix from the Mixer<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
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    An esteemed Elder was…. steamed. Celebrating the beginning of a new semester, the faculty threw a mixer. Our Elder summarized the event in two words:“Cubed Velveeta.” Let’s step back and look at the UCSB Chancellor, for ultimately, he is lactose-responsible. Let’s put all these numbers in context. Let’s assume Prof. Yang works 40 hours per […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[87,37,28],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-47804","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-california","category-scholarship-erudition","category-will-there-be-a-buffet"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47804","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=47804"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47804\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":47835,"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47804\/revisions\/47835"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=47804"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=47804"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wlbott.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=47804"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}